Sunday, April 24, 2011
It's been quite some time that i have not updated my blog. and so , today i am back to update. hehe.
on Monday, 18th April 2011, we were supposed to meet in the afternoon after he ends his work. but sadly, he text me saying that he dont feel like meeting anyone. so, i was seriously upset. however, i kept myself calm and said that there is nothing for me to be upset with. and that he just needed some time by himself. i managed.
at around 9pm that day, i receive his sudden text message which makes me smile and my eyes was tearing when i read it. it was a short and simple message saying. " just so you know.. i miss you soo freaking alot. " this is enough to make my heart soothe. then i replied. but there was no reply from him. and again, i smiled when he called and asked if i can meet him. i smiled. i was so happy that i could meet him at last. and that this time, he was the one that came to me..
when i met him, i realised that his face was down. he looks so sad. my heart sank when i saw his facial expression. i kept on asking what is wrong. but he didnt want to tell me anything. so i kept quiet.
then....
he held my hand tight when i held his hand. then he said to me that he came to meet me to say something.
i look into his eyes, my heart sank again. i could see that he looks as though he was about to cry. his face was serious. my heart became heavy. i was afraid of what he is going to say. then, he pushed my head nearer to his chest. he then kissed my forehead. i could feel the warmness of the kiss. i feel like crying. then he said " sorry. " the moment i heard that, i feel like crying. i was like numb. i wanted to talk. but i know, i would cry. then, i took a deep breathe. and i asked why. he said sorry for everything, for controlling you and just everything. tears was brimming in my eyes. then, i told myself to not cry. then, i said to him that everything is fine. its okay. then he went about to say about his nightmare. and again, the more i feel like crying. and i keep on telling him that everything is going to be okay. and that it was just the play of your sleep. there's nothing to worry.
when my tears is about to fall off, he asked me to go for a stroll with him. so i stood up, held his hands. secretly wipe off my tears. took a deep breathe. and started talking as normal as i can. we talked about his nightmare and what has been done. then, he stopped. he turn to me, and said " i need a hug. " the moment he said that, my heart felt heavy with tears. i hugged him so tight. i could also feel that he hugged me so tight that i could not breathe. eventually, tears fell down from my eyes. i wiped it off when im still in his arms. he walked me home, then before leaving, i hugged him again. and i just burst into tears. i just cant stop crying.
i was so afraid. afraid that i would lose him. i dont feel like going home that moment. i just want to be beside him the whole night, the whole day, the whole time. i want to ensure that he's fine. the way he wiped off my tears... the way he calm me down... i just love him for every of that. the way he suddenly said " is it you or is it me ? " he just know how to make me laugh again. he was referring to my height. he knows how to calm me down. he's simply the best.
i love the part whereby he said " hey, wait. i forget to tell you another thing. " and i was like, " what? "
he then pulled me one side, and kissed me like there's no tomorrow.
baby, i love you. i love you till the extend that i just cant see me without you.
Blogged
@ 9:57 PM
Don't let me go -
